I Am: Embracing Your Writer's Identity
Cultivating the Writer's Mindset Part II: The Power of "I am"
Welcome to Part II of "Cultivating the Writer’s Mindset," a series focused on unlocking your creative potential by addressing the thoughts and beliefs that limit you. As we explore how these internal barriers contribute to self-doubt, imposter syndrome, perfectionism, and other negative patterns writers face, you'll learn to reshape your thinking, paving the way for ease and success. If you haven't read Part I, I recommend starting there.
Before the pandemic, I often traveled to schools to inspire students to write. I’d share insight into the world of comics, talking about where ideas come from, how scripts tell the story with words, and what it’s like working with artists. The kids’ enthusiasm and energy proved contagious, and I always left those classrooms motivated to write more.
The first time I spoke about writing comics, a second-grade girl pulled me aside afterward and proudly exclaimed, “I’m a writer, too.” Then she showed me a story she wrote for class. There were only a few sentences on the lined notebook paper, all of them penned in her erratic handwriting, with varying sizes and a chaotic style only a step from unreadable. Her radiant smile told me she was immensely proud of her efforts.
I loved encouraging those kids to follow their dreams, and it didn’t take long to recognize how their wording differed from those of adults I’ve worked with. From that very first visit, I noticed that when kids told me they wanted to be writers or artists when they grew up, they did so by suggesting they were already what they wanted to be.
“I’m an artist,” one boy said before showing me sketches of a donut-eating supervillain he’d been working on.
For kids, doing the thing meant you were that thing. I write, so I’m a writer. But somewhere along the way, our thoughts and beliefs change. Our disappointments and failures, the regrets we harbor and the criticisms we’ve received, our constant goal-setting and comparisons… they all combine to suggest that writing is no longer enough to consider oneself a writer.
When I announced I was leaving my corporate writing career, I had lunch with a few co-workers who knew I was leaving to become a full-time fiction writer and editor.
“This is probably the coolest excuse I’ve ever heard for quitting,” the project manager told me. “I’ve always wanted to be a writer.”
“Yeah, me too,” said one of the team’s software developers. “It beats coding.”
When I asked if they had written anything, the manager told me about the poems she’d written, and the programmer told me he sometimes wrote a blog about politics.
“Then you’re already writers.”
“Oh, but that doesn’t count,” she said. “I don’t publish them.”
And he gave a nervous laugh, saying, “No one reads my blog.”
For them, the act of writing wasn’t enough. For them, publishing and finding a certain number of readers are what makes a person a writer.
Most writers I encounter—the adult ones, anyway—equate “being a writer” with a certain level of success.
I once introduced a friend of mine as a writer. His response? “Oh, I only wrote one book, so it’s not like I’m a real writer or anything.”
Part of the problem is that, for many adults, their goal is a moving target. They’re not a writer until they publish that first book. And when they do, if they “only” self-publish, then what would really earn the title of writer is publishing traditionally. If that happens, they need a certain number of sales before they deem themselves a writer. After that, it’s more about how much money they’ve made.
How can you expect to find success as a writer if you never truly consider yourself a writer?
Yes, we all have goals and dreams. We want to be “better” in some way. But wanting to be better doesn’t mean you’re not already a writer.
You’ll never find the writing success you desire if you can’t allow yourself to identify as the thing you want to be. And if you do, the process won’t be nearly as enjoyable.
Let me share a personal example.
After college, I spent several years as a reporter, writing and publishing 5-10 articles a week. From there, my career shifted to writing software user manuals and pilot training material. For fun, I’d often spend nights and weekends writing book reviews and personal essays.
You know what? I never considered myself a writer. I mean, sure, logically, I knew that’s what I was doing. But I was never a writer.
Instead, in some subconscious way I wasn’t aware of, I believed writing was associated with fiction. I always dreamed of writing a novel or screenplay, of being the next Stephen King, and anything short of that was just a day job or a hobby. It didn’t count.
Despite writing nearly every day for 25 years, inside, I felt unfulfilled. As if I had let myself down in some way. I was supposed to be a writer, but instead, I was just... I don’t even know what to call someone who writes but isn’t a writer, but that’s who I was.
Do you see how silly that is?
The kids have it right. If you draw, you’re an artist. If you paint, you’re a painter. And if you write, you’re a writer.
Write short stories that you don’t publish? You’re a writer.
Write a blog no one reads? You’re a writer.
Yes, I believe we need to overcome our fear of publishing. We need to share our work with the world. And if our goal is financial prosperity or to be read by the masses, we need to learn to promote ourselves so we reach a larger audience.
But even if those are your goals, that doesn’t mean you’re not already on your way.
You don’t need my permission or anyone else’s to consider yourself a writer.
To cultivate the mind of a successful writer, you must first accept that you already are.
A Writer’s Identity
You might not be here because you want to be a writer. Maybe you want to be a “better” writer, whatever “better” might mean for you.
To get there, you’ll likely need to set some goals and create some habits. And for those to be a success, you need to change who you are.
In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear provides examples of how improving your systems and making small changes can lead to remarkable results. The book is filled with practical insight.
But he provides the biggest truth right up front. He gives the answer to everything in Chapter 2 when he writes, “Many people begin the process of changing their habits by focusing on what they want to achieve. This leads us to outcome-based habits. The alternative is to build identity-based habits. With this approach, we start by focusing on who we wish to become.”
The goal isn’t to write a book, it’s to become a writer.
The goal isn’t to sell more comics, it’s to become a best-selling comic writer.
This is where the kids have it right. If you do a thing, you are that thing. I write, therefore, I’m a writer.
When we dip our toes into being the person we want to be, we start to act the part. We take our first few tentative steps and put in the right efforts. But for many of us, we’re used to instant gratification. And if we don’t see the results immediately, we reenter the state of wanting. After a week of practice, we don’t see the outcome we want, so we revert back to the person we are trying to outgrow, so we give up.
So many of us think you have to do the thing first, but that’s wrong. You first need to identify as the person who’s already done it. Not once, but every day!
How Identity Helped Me Overcome Back Pain
I’ve always been athletic. I enjoy hiking, running, working out, and mountain biking. Several years ago, I took it up a notch by focusing on my exercise routines and eating habits. I grew stronger and healthier than I’d ever been.
Until I injured my back.
I took time off but resting improved nothing. The only things that helped were lying on the floor or going for a walk. They offered only minor relief, and that faint relief was temporary.
It was, without a doubt, the most excruciating pain I’ve ever experienced.
I went to a physical therapist, but the routines he provided didn’t help. Unfortunately, it wasn’t just sore muscles or overtraining. An MRI proved that I had a herniated disc.
So I got an injection, but like the eight months of stretching and exercises before it, it didn’t help. I thought my life was over. The pain was constant. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t sit at my desk long enough to work. No writing. No editing. I was miserable.
Then I heard about the book Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection by the professor and psychiatrist John E. Sarno. His theory questioned the traditional assumption that herniated discs caused pain. If they do, he suggested, the pain should only be temporary.
Before I read it, I assumed the guy was a quack whose book was filled with unscientific mumbo jumbo. But I tried it anyway. I told myself the pain was in my head. I was reluctant at first, but I repeated it every day: I’m healthy. I’m strong. My back is fine.
I started visualizing myself going about my life as I used to, free from pain. Hiking. Biking. Working out.
I took it one day at a time. Instead of thinking about my back health a decade in the future, I focused on what I could control in the moment. I could control how I sat and how often I took breaks. I could control what shoes I wore and how far I walked. I could control how often I did core exercises and stretched.
Not only did I believe I would get better, I told myself I already was better. I told myself that not only would I end my back pain, but that it didn’t hurt in the first place.
Within a couple of days, my back pain had receded to a dull ache. Eventually, weeks passed when I felt no pain whatsoever.
You might be thinking I lost my mind. Or that, for some random reason unknown in the medical world, it took three extra months for the injection to kick in.
But nope. That’s not what happened.
I’m not suggesting that my beliefs literally fixed my back pain. I wasn’t lying on the floor when my mind created a miracle. Instead, I stopped identifying as a person limited by back pain and started identifying as someone healthy and strong.
From there, I started noticing how my actions were helping me. After seeing improvements, no matter how minor, my beliefs solidified even further.
My beliefs changed my thoughts, which, in turn, changed my actions.
The first step to a higher self-concept involves shedding your old views.
The Power of “I am”
The phrase "I am" is incredibly powerful because it shapes the way you perceive yourself and influences your mindset. Declaring "I am" followed by positive or empowering words can reinforce your beliefs and actions, fostering a strong sense of identity and purpose.
Unfortunately, many writers and artists focus on the things they are not. “I’m not a good writer.” Or “I’m not a very prolific writer.” Or “I’m not a successful writer.” (Or, on those darker days, we simply run with, “I’m a loser. I’ll never be a writer.”)
Being mindful of the words you use, especially in self-talk, can profoundly impact your confidence and motivation. For instance, saying "I am capable" or "I am committed" not only reflects a positive self-view but can also propel you toward your goals with greater determination.
This practice involves not only choosing words carefully but also being aware of negative self-talk. Redirecting such thoughts into positive affirmations can lead to personal growth and a more optimistic perspective on challenges.
By consistently focusing on empowering "I am" statements, you can create a mindset that aligns with your aspirations and fosters success in all areas of life.
Okay, great, but how do I actually do it?
Years ago, I read about a man named Neville Goddard, a mystic philosopher who believed our thoughts control our reality. He suggested that the moments before drifting off to sleep were the most powerful for visualization. That calm, dream-like state was the prime moment to impress upon your subconscious.
With that in mind, I started using the moment before drifting off to sleep to set intentions and visualize my dreams coming true.
I was skeptical at first. Mantras and affirmations were never my thing, and the first time I tried it, I talked myself out of doing it. But over the years, I’ve learned that my ego is a sneaky little devil. In this case, I realized I didn’t want to proclaim to be a writer, even to myself, because I never had before. How dare I declare to be the person I want to be.
But I tried it. And you know what? I felt a sense of euphoria. I couldn’t stop smiling. Claiming “I am a writer” felt so damn good. It felt empowering. It felt right.
That’s when I realized how a simple mindset shift coupled with a simple reinforcing statement can make it become a reality.
This identity shift, this awareness of my “I am” statements, not only helped me overcome back pain, but also helped me improve my editing business, write multiple books in 2024, and start writing this Substack.
It can help you become the person you want to be, too.
Exercises
If you’re stuck, if you’ve got nagging issues of self-doubt, if you haven’t managed to become the writer you want to be, I suggest you start with a simple statement that might lead to a big identity shift.
This week, practice using “I am” statements to help you identify with the person you want to become.
Step 1
Tonight, as you drift off to sleep, tell yourself, “I am a writer.” Just think the words or, if you’re feeling daring, say them out loud.
If you’re ego steps in and suggests you don’t do it, simply remind your ego who’s boss and do it anyway.
The point is to start identifying as the thing you already are or the identity you want.
If you’re already writing and publishing consistently, you might want to elevate the statement. Maybe try, “I am a successful writer.”
Or perhaps, “I am a fast writer” is who you aspire to become.
If those feel too grandiose and you simply cannot accept it, consider starting with something a little more gentle, such as, “I’m open to the idea that I am a good writer.”
Do this every night for a week and see how it feels.
Step 2
First thing in the morning, and I mean immediately upon waking up before the to-do list creeps in or the negative self-talk runs rampant, repeat the same “I am” statement you did the previous night.
Repeat it several times throughout the day.
When you do, ask yourself, what would this person do today? Would a successful writer check her phone first thing in the morning, or sit down to write first? Would a successful writer surf social media, or finish that tutorial on Amazon keywords? Would a successful writer continue perfecting that pitch yet again or send it already?
Throughout the day, ask, “What would a writer do?”
Step 3
Take a moment to write your statement on paper. It doesn’t have to be anything more than, “I am a writer.” Or you can jot down various versions of the “I am” statement in a journal, but be as specific as you can be. If you write fantasy novels, you might use, “I write successful fantasy novels that are adored by thousands of fans around the world.”
But don’t just go through the motions. Own it. Believe it.
I’ve found that journalling helped me get a grasp on what I really wanted. By journalling various “I am” statements, I honed in on the writer I wanted to be. It also helped me begin to see what I care less about.
Maybe financial success is what matters for you. Or maybe impacting readers is more important. Remember, this is you. Not your friend. Not that write you follow on social media. Who do you want to be? That’s the “I am” statement to focus on.
If it helps, write “I am a writer” on a sticky note and place it where you’ll see it several times throughout the day.
Step 4
As you start to recognize the “I am” statements that work best for you and you start using them more often throughout the day, start to register the thoughts and emotions you’re having. Does it empower you, or does it incite the negative voices to push back? Is it more comforting to say, “I’m not a writer” or to list the reasons why you’re not the person you want to be?
With this step, the point isn’t to fight those negative thoughts but to simply register them. To start recognizing your limiting beliefs and negative self-talk. I’ll share insight on working through them and overcoming them later. For now, just recognize them when they arise.
Journal Prompt
With each Cultivating the Writer’s Mindset post, I’ll provide a simple statement. Each statement will elicit a thought or emotion. After reading it, take 5-10 minutes to journal about the thoughts and emotions that come to you. If journaling isn’t your thing, then at least sit with your thoughts for a moment. Ask yourself why you reacted the way you did.
Today’s prompt:
Self-publishing is for writers who aren’t good enough. Real writers are traditionally published.
Next Week
Coming up next, I’ll share the importance of setting intentions…
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