Thanks. Sometimes I share things that maybe I shouldn't share, or that maybe aren't "big enough" to write a full post about. Other times, I say screw it, it's what's on my mind and I want other writers to have even more success than I've had.
James, you stay preaching to me when I need it the most. Thanks for posting this. I have been struggling as to why it has been so hard to stay motivated and reading this makes me see that I need more than just Nate fans, no matter how much I appreciate those. Time to start building my network.
Nate fans are the best, I bet. But yeah, we all need friends who listen to us groan about the hardships of creating and celebrate when we have things to share worth celebrating. I hope you find the people you're looking for.
Absolutely. It's good to have people in your corner for everything. You have your wife and probably some others, I am also fortunate to have a few of those as well that cheer me on through all facets of my life as I do theirs'. But it's also important to have people that can specifically identify with the achievements and challenges of creating. I made music for 25 years and when I started drifting away from my circle within that arena, I think I started to lose my passion for making music. So I feel like building a new one with writers and creators in general would be super helpful.
Wow, a good article. Sometimes, I´d rather push that boulder, but I can´t live without comics :D
I often feel alone in my experiences, because out of my physical in town friends only I remained in comics, the others are doing different stuff. Other comics creators are online, on different continents and in different timezones. It´s just not the same. But this article may have inspired me to improve upon this situation, thanks.
This might be the most difficult aspect of creating. At least for me. Looking back, I think I could've done more had I listened to my own advice, so I plan to check back in on this post in 6 months to see if I've made any progress toward real connections with other writers and artists.
I’ve been trying to find a worthwhile writing group for years. I’ve been in two in-person groups—one which was so toxic, it imploded. The other I started myself with the help of the local library but there was zero interest. I’ve tried overseas online groups but the time difference means meetings tend to be around 3:00am for me. Not my best time of day.
So I have spent most of my writing life (20+ years) without any support. I’ve had books and short stories published, but it has taken its toll. Last year, I decided to give up writing. I have few books waiting for release but I’m not writing anything new.
The thing is, I’m not sure a support group would have helped. If nothing you write sells, even though publishers are willing to take you on, a support group doesn’t fix the issue.
I'm so sorry to hear you've given up writing. I hope you find your way back to it.
I'm not sure a group of friends or peers who support one another would help in terms of sales, but I'd still like to believe they'd have other value. Just feeling like you're part of a community that welcomes you as one of their own, with someone acting as a mentor or cheerleader along the way...that just sounds like a hint of bliss to me. I feel like maybe it helps provide a sort of energy and courage that I couldn't maintain on my own when the process starts to weigh me down. But maybe I'm romanticizing it because I don't have it.
I agree that a group of friends or peers who truly support you would be bliss. But finding one is near impossible. Finding one person who supports you is difficult enough!
I always feel like I'm surrounded by giants; so many amazing creators who are leveling up and pulling ahead all the time. So I don't want to "bother" anyone or be a burden. I try to avoid that trap by instead focusing on cheering on my pals who are making awesome things and trying to help spread the word about their projects, but there's a part of me that also thinks that I can't ever do enough to be worthy of their friendship, or maybe that they're just saying nice things to me to be polite. I think since creating is such a vulnerable practice, it makes us so fearful and doubtful at times. We're putting ourselves fully down on the paper, and it's nerve-wracking to put that out there. So maybe that makes us all a bit more defensive.
Cheering on friends is never a bad thing, but you indeed are worthy of friendship and support. You're a damn good artist in your own right, and there are people out there who look to you for hints of inspiration. Creating does put us in a vulnerable spot, but the more we create and share, the easier it gets...or at least, the easier it is to spot our fears and accept them. I'm glad you're here!
There is a lot of insightful information in this article. I think that a lot of industries are like what you mentioned above, but probably more-so in creative-circles. Having someone to write with, to bounce ideas off of, and to (at least to a point) hold me accountable would be fantastic, but as you said, making friends as an adult is hard enough.
I more or less feel I left all of my friends behind when we moved about 7 years ago. Don't get me wrong, I have people here I know, and I may even interact with them outside of the normal settings on occasions, but they aren't what I would consider to be friends like what I had living in relatively the same place for 30+ years. And I'm not on the same page with any of them about anything I find meaningful; career, interests, writing, beer, whatever.
I've tried some "online writing sessions" before, and those seemed to just be people writing at the same time. No talking. No interaction. Just a lot of top-of-the-head videos and people giving up and browsing facebook or whatever. I want something where I can pop onto a chat or something at 2am and hammer out a bunch of non-sense, and then later someone either chastises me or affirms I am on the right track.
I thought briefly about creating a website (or even a sub-reddit) where people are specifically searching for a writing group (and fuck-off with r/writewithme), but like many other things in my life, I'm out of my most precious commodity.
I never understood the online writing sessions. I've found a few things like that on Meetup, but the idea of writing while others are heads down writing too... I get the general idea of proximity, but that's not my jam.
If you haven't tried meetup.com for your area, I suggest you give it a try. It took me a while to figure out how to navigate it in a way that provided me solid intel on groups in my area, but it's a good way to meet people interested in similar things.
A post like this takes guts. Just wanted to share with you that it's highly appreciated,
Thanks. Sometimes I share things that maybe I shouldn't share, or that maybe aren't "big enough" to write a full post about. Other times, I say screw it, it's what's on my mind and I want other writers to have even more success than I've had.
James, you stay preaching to me when I need it the most. Thanks for posting this. I have been struggling as to why it has been so hard to stay motivated and reading this makes me see that I need more than just Nate fans, no matter how much I appreciate those. Time to start building my network.
Nate fans are the best, I bet. But yeah, we all need friends who listen to us groan about the hardships of creating and celebrate when we have things to share worth celebrating. I hope you find the people you're looking for.
Absolutely. It's good to have people in your corner for everything. You have your wife and probably some others, I am also fortunate to have a few of those as well that cheer me on through all facets of my life as I do theirs'. But it's also important to have people that can specifically identify with the achievements and challenges of creating. I made music for 25 years and when I started drifting away from my circle within that arena, I think I started to lose my passion for making music. So I feel like building a new one with writers and creators in general would be super helpful.
Wow, a good article. Sometimes, I´d rather push that boulder, but I can´t live without comics :D
I often feel alone in my experiences, because out of my physical in town friends only I remained in comics, the others are doing different stuff. Other comics creators are online, on different continents and in different timezones. It´s just not the same. But this article may have inspired me to improve upon this situation, thanks.
This might be the most difficult aspect of creating. At least for me. Looking back, I think I could've done more had I listened to my own advice, so I plan to check back in on this post in 6 months to see if I've made any progress toward real connections with other writers and artists.
I’ve been trying to find a worthwhile writing group for years. I’ve been in two in-person groups—one which was so toxic, it imploded. The other I started myself with the help of the local library but there was zero interest. I’ve tried overseas online groups but the time difference means meetings tend to be around 3:00am for me. Not my best time of day.
So I have spent most of my writing life (20+ years) without any support. I’ve had books and short stories published, but it has taken its toll. Last year, I decided to give up writing. I have few books waiting for release but I’m not writing anything new.
The thing is, I’m not sure a support group would have helped. If nothing you write sells, even though publishers are willing to take you on, a support group doesn’t fix the issue.
I'm so sorry to hear you've given up writing. I hope you find your way back to it.
I'm not sure a group of friends or peers who support one another would help in terms of sales, but I'd still like to believe they'd have other value. Just feeling like you're part of a community that welcomes you as one of their own, with someone acting as a mentor or cheerleader along the way...that just sounds like a hint of bliss to me. I feel like maybe it helps provide a sort of energy and courage that I couldn't maintain on my own when the process starts to weigh me down. But maybe I'm romanticizing it because I don't have it.
I agree that a group of friends or peers who truly support you would be bliss. But finding one is near impossible. Finding one person who supports you is difficult enough!
I agree. 100%. If I didn't have my wife, I'm sure I'd have given up on all of this long ago.
I always feel like I'm surrounded by giants; so many amazing creators who are leveling up and pulling ahead all the time. So I don't want to "bother" anyone or be a burden. I try to avoid that trap by instead focusing on cheering on my pals who are making awesome things and trying to help spread the word about their projects, but there's a part of me that also thinks that I can't ever do enough to be worthy of their friendship, or maybe that they're just saying nice things to me to be polite. I think since creating is such a vulnerable practice, it makes us so fearful and doubtful at times. We're putting ourselves fully down on the paper, and it's nerve-wracking to put that out there. So maybe that makes us all a bit more defensive.
Cheering on friends is never a bad thing, but you indeed are worthy of friendship and support. You're a damn good artist in your own right, and there are people out there who look to you for hints of inspiration. Creating does put us in a vulnerable spot, but the more we create and share, the easier it gets...or at least, the easier it is to spot our fears and accept them. I'm glad you're here!
There is a lot of insightful information in this article. I think that a lot of industries are like what you mentioned above, but probably more-so in creative-circles. Having someone to write with, to bounce ideas off of, and to (at least to a point) hold me accountable would be fantastic, but as you said, making friends as an adult is hard enough.
I more or less feel I left all of my friends behind when we moved about 7 years ago. Don't get me wrong, I have people here I know, and I may even interact with them outside of the normal settings on occasions, but they aren't what I would consider to be friends like what I had living in relatively the same place for 30+ years. And I'm not on the same page with any of them about anything I find meaningful; career, interests, writing, beer, whatever.
I've tried some "online writing sessions" before, and those seemed to just be people writing at the same time. No talking. No interaction. Just a lot of top-of-the-head videos and people giving up and browsing facebook or whatever. I want something where I can pop onto a chat or something at 2am and hammer out a bunch of non-sense, and then later someone either chastises me or affirms I am on the right track.
I thought briefly about creating a website (or even a sub-reddit) where people are specifically searching for a writing group (and fuck-off with r/writewithme), but like many other things in my life, I'm out of my most precious commodity.
I never understood the online writing sessions. I've found a few things like that on Meetup, but the idea of writing while others are heads down writing too... I get the general idea of proximity, but that's not my jam.
If you haven't tried meetup.com for your area, I suggest you give it a try. It took me a while to figure out how to navigate it in a way that provided me solid intel on groups in my area, but it's a good way to meet people interested in similar things.