I recently met someone at a public library for a kid's event. We got to talking and he asked me what I did for a living. I said "I write comic books." He said "What comic books do you write?" and as he did he was pulling out his phone, as if to look them up. I said "Well I write indie comic books that I publish through Kickstarter." I listed a couple of my titles. The look on his face changed, and he put his phone away, without looking anything up. Then he changed the subject.
It's hard to remain excited to talk about your achievements with people outside the bubble of actual readers of our stuff, because they consistently think so little of it. If I was writing Batman? Oh that would be cool. But an indie comic book series I poured ten years of my life into, that resonates at the same frequency as my existence because I've given everything I am to it? That's nice.
Woof indeed. I've been there, and I know how that feels. Even if it's a subconscious hit, I know you still felt it. I know you have plenty of readers who love your work, and hopefully the feedback from them registers just as loudly.
I'm sure Rowling, Tolkein, Martin and so many other creatives received similar treatment in the budding moments of their careers.
My hope for you is that one day your work blows up and this same dude approaches you and claims he's always been your biggest fan, but you can't remember ever meeting him.
This resonates so much. My Mum’s response to anything I did was, “What do you want to do that for?” She never read anything I wrote, never saw any play or concert I performed in, and didn’t come to my university graduation ceremonies. I see that sense of not being worthy enough playing out all the time, not so much in the work itself, but in my creative and other relationships. It’s not an easy thing to fix, so I’ve learned to manage it as best I can.
Sigh. Do you ever get tired of managing it instead of, I don't know, just being? That's not a question I'm actually asking, since that's so heavy, but sometimes it's one I sit with. It's like, can I stop managing this and just be me for once? hahaha
This answer is a bit dark, but I’ve needed to manage it less since her death as her ability to reopen old wounds has gone. That doesn’t mean the scar tissue doesn’t occasionally twinge. Ultimately though, it’s like every solution to mental issues. There is no cure. There is only management.
Thanks! I can't wait to share it. I'll admit, I've read it so many times now that I'm sort of over the whole thing, but it's got so many tips and explanations. I do think writers will find a lot of value in it.
Congratulations on your latest book! You should be proud of ALL the accomplishments you have made in your life! I hope you keep proudly showing your work.
You know, being proud is something I'm only learning now. Or at least recognizing it as such. I've always just done things because I enjoyed them, and that was enough for me. But yes, more and more, I pause long enough to feel accomplished.
I think it's both. But not because people irl don't get it.
It seems like an online audience is an amplification of real life. If you show 20 people your work irl maybe 1 of them really digs it and actually reads it, etc.
But online, you're not showing it to 20 people. In the span of a year it's probably closer to 1000 (guessing).
So the positive response comes from the same small proportion of the total number of people who saw it, but the numbers are bigger because of the reach.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think there are people who get it and people who don't in both places. I think that in both places there are far fewer people who get it, but online you just don't see the mass of people who scroll by. Only the ones who stay.
In general, do you get more of the positive reaction online than in real life? I've often wondered if it's because my close circle doesn't understand creativity and art, or if, in their own way, they're trying to help and/or relate.
Wow, thanks for letting me know I'm not alone in this regard. Looking back I've been guilty of crediting other people (often fictitious) for an idea or thing I had come up, just to give it some credibility. All because it was painfully obvious that when it was evidently mine, it would be ignored or even scooped.
Damn, that sucks to hear. I've done the same thing so many times. Hell, I remember holding a wine tasting party as an excuse to get friends together. I made it into a contest, with these funny, handwritten tasting cards that got (hopefully) funnier as the night went on. Spent hours setting them up. When someone asked about them, I said, "Oh, I just downloaded them online," just so I didn't have to hear, "You should've done this instead."
Sigh. Sorry to hear you do that, too. But I hope you're starting to see being open/honest is the better route, even if they're be bumps in the road.
Dude, you have my sincerest commiserations, and my solidarity! lol.
It's a sad aspect of human nature to demean or even destroy something or someone just because it's tangible and/or present to do so, but idolize anything or anyone that's beyond their reach. i.e. Ferraris, celebrities... That unaffordable restaurant in Denmark that serves live ants (◎﹏◎)
As such, it's also why any God on high is so revered and tantamount to omnipotentcy and perfection, but an Earth born version ends up stapled to a cross, or a nice guy like Ghandi shot. Extreme examples of course, but it's rooted from the same place.
If it's any consolation, I'm now open/honest about my input. Just enough to be confident for me to be me, but not enough to stifle others. At least that's the goal.
Oh no. Well, if anything, keyboards and piano keys are similar, right? Sorta? Maybe she'd like a recording of the click-clacking of the keyboard from your last writing session. :)
That's what I thought. And several people who have seen me at the keyboard have said the same thing. Or, "Your hands move like your mother's." She did read one of my books in which there's a church.organist who becomes an alcoholic.She was livid.
.. "Now people will think I was an alcoholic all those years."I told her no one ever believed there was only sheet music n that bench. Not appreciated. On the bright side, I was the one with her when she died. No notes. No alcohol.
Damn, James. This one hit home.
I recently met someone at a public library for a kid's event. We got to talking and he asked me what I did for a living. I said "I write comic books." He said "What comic books do you write?" and as he did he was pulling out his phone, as if to look them up. I said "Well I write indie comic books that I publish through Kickstarter." I listed a couple of my titles. The look on his face changed, and he put his phone away, without looking anything up. Then he changed the subject.
It's hard to remain excited to talk about your achievements with people outside the bubble of actual readers of our stuff, because they consistently think so little of it. If I was writing Batman? Oh that would be cool. But an indie comic book series I poured ten years of my life into, that resonates at the same frequency as my existence because I've given everything I am to it? That's nice.
Woof.
Woof indeed. I've been there, and I know how that feels. Even if it's a subconscious hit, I know you still felt it. I know you have plenty of readers who love your work, and hopefully the feedback from them registers just as loudly.
I'm sure Rowling, Tolkein, Martin and so many other creatives received similar treatment in the budding moments of their careers.
My hope for you is that one day your work blows up and this same dude approaches you and claims he's always been your biggest fan, but you can't remember ever meeting him.
You wrote the words right out of my head! 😆
This resonates so much. My Mum’s response to anything I did was, “What do you want to do that for?” She never read anything I wrote, never saw any play or concert I performed in, and didn’t come to my university graduation ceremonies. I see that sense of not being worthy enough playing out all the time, not so much in the work itself, but in my creative and other relationships. It’s not an easy thing to fix, so I’ve learned to manage it as best I can.
Sigh. Do you ever get tired of managing it instead of, I don't know, just being? That's not a question I'm actually asking, since that's so heavy, but sometimes it's one I sit with. It's like, can I stop managing this and just be me for once? hahaha
This answer is a bit dark, but I’ve needed to manage it less since her death as her ability to reopen old wounds has gone. That doesn’t mean the scar tissue doesn’t occasionally twinge. Ultimately though, it’s like every solution to mental issues. There is no cure. There is only management.
"Only management." I like that. Thanks for sharing.
Looks incredible! Can’t wait to get a copy.
Thanks! I can't wait to share it. I'll admit, I've read it so many times now that I'm sort of over the whole thing, but it's got so many tips and explanations. I do think writers will find a lot of value in it.
Congratulations on your latest book! You should be proud of ALL the accomplishments you have made in your life! I hope you keep proudly showing your work.
You know, being proud is something I'm only learning now. Or at least recognizing it as such. I've always just done things because I enjoyed them, and that was enough for me. But yes, more and more, I pause long enough to feel accomplished.
Count me as one of the people online that can’t wait to get it! Definitely recognize the feeling you’re describing.
This doesn't feel like one of those things to say, "Nice to know I'm not alone," but at the same time, it's true.
I think it's both. But not because people irl don't get it.
It seems like an online audience is an amplification of real life. If you show 20 people your work irl maybe 1 of them really digs it and actually reads it, etc.
But online, you're not showing it to 20 people. In the span of a year it's probably closer to 1000 (guessing).
So the positive response comes from the same small proportion of the total number of people who saw it, but the numbers are bigger because of the reach.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think there are people who get it and people who don't in both places. I think that in both places there are far fewer people who get it, but online you just don't see the mass of people who scroll by. Only the ones who stay.
Well said.
This is why I share my stories with people online and not irl.
I think it's just that they simply don't get it. So they give a reaction they perceive is appropriate.
They are wrong.
Although, to be fair, I do get more support and encouraging reactions than some of the stories I'm seeing here.
And, to be equally fair in the opposite direction, that positive reaction comes from a severe minority of people I tell.
In general, do you get more of the positive reaction online than in real life? I've often wondered if it's because my close circle doesn't understand creativity and art, or if, in their own way, they're trying to help and/or relate.
Wow, thanks for letting me know I'm not alone in this regard. Looking back I've been guilty of crediting other people (often fictitious) for an idea or thing I had come up, just to give it some credibility. All because it was painfully obvious that when it was evidently mine, it would be ignored or even scooped.
Damn, that sucks to hear. I've done the same thing so many times. Hell, I remember holding a wine tasting party as an excuse to get friends together. I made it into a contest, with these funny, handwritten tasting cards that got (hopefully) funnier as the night went on. Spent hours setting them up. When someone asked about them, I said, "Oh, I just downloaded them online," just so I didn't have to hear, "You should've done this instead."
Sigh. Sorry to hear you do that, too. But I hope you're starting to see being open/honest is the better route, even if they're be bumps in the road.
Dude, you have my sincerest commiserations, and my solidarity! lol.
It's a sad aspect of human nature to demean or even destroy something or someone just because it's tangible and/or present to do so, but idolize anything or anyone that's beyond their reach. i.e. Ferraris, celebrities... That unaffordable restaurant in Denmark that serves live ants (◎﹏◎)
As such, it's also why any God on high is so revered and tantamount to omnipotentcy and perfection, but an Earth born version ends up stapled to a cross, or a nice guy like Ghandi shot. Extreme examples of course, but it's rooted from the same place.
If it's any consolation, I'm now open/honest about my input. Just enough to be confident for me to be me, but not enough to stifle others. At least that's the goal.
Thank you from another victim of a tight lipped mother. I was supposed to be a pianist.
Oh no. Well, if anything, keyboards and piano keys are similar, right? Sorta? Maybe she'd like a recording of the click-clacking of the keyboard from your last writing session. :)
That's what I thought. And several people who have seen me at the keyboard have said the same thing. Or, "Your hands move like your mother's." She did read one of my books in which there's a church.organist who becomes an alcoholic.She was livid.
.. "Now people will think I was an alcoholic all those years."I told her no one ever believed there was only sheet music n that bench. Not appreciated. On the bright side, I was the one with her when she died. No notes. No alcohol.
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